22 Comments

  1. it was supposed to be an air bnb in colorado,
    courts are stressful
    my ex was lying, trying to look good, not sure why
    i thought i wouldn't be able to see my wee offspring, was surprised he said I could
    I would spend the entire week in town to rest from the drive and he repeatedly said no
    strange to be denied my child's own car seat, had to ask for that, step mom
    they had also send summer clothes in the middle of winter and no coat
    they had gotten married out of his fear, he didn't put my name on the daycare papers despite being the mother
    we were in separation, i had to save myself and if i stayed i was concerned for my own health and safety, knew he would use her to regain the relationship
    he was allowing a girl he had dated for two months to pick up our child without my knowledge, so he married her quickly
    found six UTI's likely from unchanged diapers, his name is on the hotline; kept telling me he was going to ER for high fever
    had an emergency and he didn't follow the parenting plan

    in the years to come, i needed transportation reduced because the injury taken was likely caused by him… legit it was
    family court gave me child support payment
    i felt like i had to agree to the divorce so we could keep our income else it would have been 20k eight years contested

    the man i was with asked me about marriage again after all of those years,
    i told him i feared that my ex husband would try to take his money
    it wasn't until i did my inner work that i realized my ex husband did
    i came in fair 50/50 knowing the courts favored neither parent, and didn't hold him accountable for my need to move elsewhere
    it was supposed to be bulk visitation… 1-2 times visitation a year, he made it into 4-5 visitations per year despite the 900 miles between us and my taking the cost of transportation as a stay at home mom

    during separation i didn't know how i was to afford to see our child, pay for day care or visitation
    it was likely i would never see her again

    i was so very grateful to the man i was with,
    he didn't want me to return home
    but i didn't want another child

    it is said that it takes time for things to show up
    likely would have been better to have gone home because everything is too obscure
    my ex had passed me out into a dreamless slumber years before the child came into the world
    i blamed myself for what had transpired for i had agreed to it; we were both at fault
    i had wondered how i was to pay for her food, diapers, daycare, and clothing

    took a while to line up information,
    he had abandoned her at my foster mothers for a week
    meanwhile the guy i was with was playing the latest release of world of warcraft
    i was waiting for the phone call for my child and stayed out of it for concern of tampering,
    receiving full custody is not easy

    my kid wanted to be accepted as the biological child of her stepmother so badly after her two half brothers were born
    she didn't know what her favorite color was any more
    i taught her how to ride her bike without training wheels, potty trained her for no more UTIs, and had her hair cut for the first time after she ate her food with her hair without moving the hair aside
    made dresses to show her i loved her, maybe she wasn't allowed to wear them

    it was strange how my ex reacted, our relationship was not emotionally involved
    i figured i would be safe after the divorce, was surprised to face such hardships
    it was all rather one sided, i had set aside my emotions bringing out the adult within to take up the task of parenting in a business like manner
    he called me cold after he tried to emotionally manipulate me with the child

    anyway, i wasn't certain what i was doing back home for my one week waiting for the court hearing
    but a storm came through and knocked out the power to a fast food fridge
    i wanted to know what someone else wanted from me someone i had liked a long time
    i was surprised to look into my basket and find that i suffered from loneliness in adult relationships
    very happy to be a mom, not lonely there

  2. Monsta X songs r sooo super awesome
    It's unfortunate to see songs with good lyrics are underrated
    And lyrics with trash so popular

    Where this world is headed to is concerning

    Thankyou monsta X for such beautiful song

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